No, silly. I’m not talking about the black coils strands from my dark-skinned scalp. I meant, from within.
I feel as though I have been able to absorb much more meaningful information. And not the typical workday information or “the tea” you think of. I’m talking about the things that help us work together. Whether we see them or not, it’s worth figuring out.
I’ve always been an observer. A manager of my mine and I used to people-watch in the airports on our breaks for fun. As I’ve been watching all of you out there. I see that we converse less. We shorten the English vocabulary on a daily. BUT YET ARE STILL MISUNDERSTOOD. How unfortunate it is to have come so far in the world, but only have science and technology to show for it. I am not sure how many times this can be repeated, but communication is key.
There are many things I have been pushing myself through these quarantine days. I am now ready to share it all — sorry I’ve been dragging along.
I’ve been addicted to this song, and recently cried tears of joy on my way to work. What hit home was the second verse.
“Tracin’ an old pattern
Drawing the lines from where I am and from where I wanna be
Forget that old adage
That history continues to keep us from the world we wanna see”
The song is called I can change by Lake Street Dive. It reminded me of the tough love that I later grew up to love. It made me more than I thought it ever could. Tough love isn’t always good — it was and still is a very big part of my/our community. As strong and determined as it made me, I do think I will lessen the blow for those to come after me.
I remember feeling like tough love was just how life was. Now I see that growing up with that normalized the tone, energy, reaction, choice of words, and so much more. To this day I am still recognizing how this normalization has hindered my clear/genuine communication with others.
Tough love comes from always having to do better, having to prove yourself to another, working harder than the next person, never getting a break, and so much more.
There is no blame to be found. That’s not what I want, nor is it what I am looking for. I PREFER to go with understanding — understanding changes everything.
No matter what it is, where you are, or how tough it is, we can still change. Some cycles need to be broken. Over time, the concrete will crumble.
Whatever it is. You can do it. We all can!