Relationships are tough! All of them — friends, coworkers, partners. This is going to get a bit wordy. I apologize in advance for those gasping at the length. However, I plan to share how I think all relationships can work. Now I’m not saying the meanie you know will learn and grow to be great, but I do hopes this helps.
There are so many different relationships to share with others. Do you regularly see the mailman? The same cashier at the gas station? Your boss, coworker, best friend, and the list goes on. These relationships all have basic commonalities. Communication, trust, work, and care are high on the list when working on relationships.
Communication is the most important part of this topic. If you aren’t upfront with your mood, how your day went, feelings, needs, wants — your partner may never know. So while you are carrying the weight of chores, kids and so on, they are oblivious to how much of a front you put on. It’s not easy getting everything done alone, ask for help or split it up. You don’t even know how many times communication will pop up in this post.
Money problems usually happen in relationships that are much more intimate. Be up front (communicate) and collaborate ideas and decisions when it comes to finances. Working with two incomes will always trump one.
Anything involving sex requires attention, communication and care. Sometimes the sex drives between two people aren’t the same, life has worn you down and you are tired. So many things can be an obstacle for your sex life. Make time to have quality intimate time. It’s important to you and your partner, even if it’s just a small amount.
Do you have kids? Share your time as well as together time. No one parent should only be in charge of the children’s wellbeing. Also, make sure you are on the same page as it is more efficient and helpful to each other. There shouldn’t be a good cop or a bad cop, just two equal parts.
Stress at work? Troubles like that take a toll on you! Heck, eight hours of your day or more are logged there. Make sure you are resolving issues with work, planning ahead for big projects, communicating effectively with your team. And if that’s not enough I’m sure your partner or friend (support system) can open an ear to hear you out. Venting feels good.
Share your frustrations as well as the things you find joy in. If you only talk about the bad things, I would get tired of talking to you too. Appreciate the small things and be sure to acknowledge them in a timely manner.
Chores are tough, but someone has to be the adults, right? Take turns doing things you don’t like. Or pick a day to do it each week so it becomes a habit. I promise, getting things done around the house goes a long way in her eyes. He’ll barely notice…I mean, most men may not.
Trusting in each other is another important thing. If you can’t trust your partner, then I ask “why”. You should be able to trust your partner to not hurt you intentionally and/or know that you can count on each other one-hundred percent.
Stress and anxiety that you are having is better to be said, let it off your chest. Sharing helps lighten the load. It also gives your partner advance notice of your current headspace.
Personalities are interesting, everyone is different. Get to know your partner or friend as much as you can. There will be little nuances and small things you may notice about their character and or preferences. Knowing this goes a long way when you want to do something nice for them.
What are your needs? Your partner’s needs? Whether it is meditating every morning or date night every week just know these things take compromise. You have to give and take on both sides, it’ll never be even. However, that is the point of love, the unconditional part.
Love is a challenge in itself. We naturally want to love. Sometimes it’s hard and I understand the different reasons why this could be. Think about culture, upbringing, views, morals, and so on. But if it’s a friend, partner, boss or what have you, just know it takes work on both sides.
I’m sure there is more to add to this but I leave that up to you. What things do you do to help your relationships work?
Until next time.